OK, this story
is more than a month old, but the sheer hilarity of it has no expiration date.
Georgia's Ned Jones gave new meaning to breach notification policy when he walked into the Augusta Police Department in October to file a missing laptop report.
The only problem was, he filled out the complaint to include the fact that stored on the laptop were 30,000 identities that Jones had stolen.
Police immediately hit him with identity theft charges, and now he faces up to 30 years in prison.
Some of his quotes to cops were outlandishly comical:
"I don't see why I'm in trouble here. Online identity theft is like stealing music; everyone does it. Isn't the real issue here the fact that my laptop is missing."
(Both are crimes, but I can't remember the last time downloading a bootleg version of "Mr. Brightside" could result in years of financial agony for the victim).
He also said: "So many people today know the pain of having their identities stolen, but can you imagine the frustration of having over 30,000 stolen from you?"
(I'm sure those 30,000 victims aren't frustrated either).